A Mortician'due south Dazzler Secrets

Photo: Courtesy of Jamie Reed

Jamie Reed, known on the blogosphere as Embalming Queen, takes her job as a caretaker seriously. Except this Glee-loving, Lady Gaga–worshiping embalmer-mortician-in-training, is a caretaker of the dead.

When I catch Reed on the telephone on Friday, she is on her way from mortuary school to the coffin races, a Absurd Runnings–similar event for the funeral-industry set, where participants race in handmade coffins and dress up in costume. "It'll be a actually expert time!" she explains. Like the race, Reed has the ability to make her day-to-day task, restoring and beautifying dead people using cosmetics and formaldehyde, sound not morbid, and well, sweetness. She'southward more than like to Jamie Lee Curtis's Shelly in My Girl than Rainn Wilson'south Arthur in Six Feet Under. I mean, how many morticians get excited about a How-do-you-do Kitty Edible Arrangement for their altogether? Here, she talks almost the art of contouring a dead torso, that fourth dimension she used Chanel makeup for her piece of work, and the importance of a "retentiveness picture."

How did yous get started in embalming?
My background is in biological science. I was actually set up to get to medical school and I did go, but information technology turned out not to be right for me. I asked my college adviser, "At present, what exercise I do? I accept a biology caste and involvement in human beefcake."  And he said, "Why don't y'all go an embalmer?"

I ended up going to school in Kansas Metropolis and graduated final yr. You lot have to apprentice for a year. I merely got my embalmer'southward license, but I'm nonetheless working on my funeral director license.

What was your reaction when your college adviser suggested you become an embalmer?
[Existence an embalmer] is not something very well known. But I'1000 going to start promoting it more. Information technology's a really corking marriage of art and science. Even at present, I similar doing makeup. I similar mode. I like those types of things.

But I also love taking care of dead people. I did an internship at a medical examiner's office where I did autopsies. I love seeing the man body from the inside out. I have this odd, quirky personality and have always felt a little socially awkward. I feel so much more comfortable with 20 expressionless bodies than with twenty people who are alive.

This has actually helped in dealing with families. This wasn't my life's dream, but information technology is slowly becoming information technology. I think to succeed in this manufacture,  you lot have to accept this sense of empathy or this drive to really help people when they are at their lowest and most sad. Considering, you run into a lot of sad.

What is your solar day-to-day similar?
I work at an embalming company, which is different than a traditional funeral abode. We are the go-betwixt. Funeral homes contact u.s.a.. For example, they telephone call and say, "We had a patient laissez passer away at a nursing dwelling. Can you get and pick that person upward and embalm them?" Our job is completely on call.

We use machines that cutting into the neck, near the collarbone surface area. They're hooked upwards to the carotid avenue, out of the jugular vein, which is how we push all of the blood out of the body and push formaldehyde and embalming fluid into it.

I don't know if you've seen a lot of dead people or have touched their hands before, but they're firm. Embalming firms the skin. We want to go as much blood out and equally much embalming fluid into the skin.

What techniques do you lot use to make the body look, well — not dead?
Applying makeup on a body is different than putting it on living peel. I have used regular cosmetics for embalmed bodies, merely the pare is so firm, there's no way to work in your foundation. Using an airbrush gets you streak-free, nice coverage.

I took a class from an embalmer near airbrushing on a body and learned near shadows. Normally, you look at people continuing straight up. They have natural shadows on their face. When people are expressionless in a catafalque with their eyes closed, they don't have their natural shadows.

I use something called hot chocolate — it's a dark-chocolate-brown powder that looks just like what it's named for, and you use it to add in shadows. I'll shadow in crevices around the nostril, upper lip and nose, and chin. All the places where there would be natural shadows.

Then sort of like contouring for alive people. How do you lot decide the vision or look for your bodies?
You lot always want to ask for a flick. Almost of the time, you get a picture circa 1960. Or get one that is extremely small-scale and grainy. Or literally, I got one that was in blackness and white. I don't know. I've had good luck merely going with my gut.

What is the goal or desired wait when you piece of work on someone?
I want them to expect every bit natural and as peaceful equally they can. Yous don't want anyone to look strange, harsh, or uncomfortable. As much as possible, you want them to await similar they're sleeping.

A memory motion-picture show is the internal snapshot of the moment when you become to the funeral abode. It'southward when you meet your loved one in the catafalque for the kickoff time. If yous didn't practice a good chore as an embalmer, that family will have this horrible memory movie. I want my families to walk upwards to the casket and say, "That's my husband. He looks at peace. He looks like himself." That'southward what I shoot for.

But it's a weird remainder. When you lot practice makeup on yourself, you want to hide sure things and make them become away. But if I'k working on someone that'due south 82 years old, I don't want to make their imperfections go away.  You lot have to be careful about what you have away, because sometimes you get in trouble with the family. You desire to give them their colour back and even so look similar themselves.

How practise you approach the challenge of adding color?
Nosotros use some type of mascara that volition add volume. The black and the eyelashes help the optics to stand out. We also pencil in the eyebrows to requite information technology some life. I haven't used eyeliner merely because the people I'm working with — those old ladies are non eyeliner ladies. But I'k sure if eyeliner was important to them, I would do that.

For the lips, we tend to use just regular lipsticks and lip glosses. Every funeral dwelling has a lot random makeup. Nosotros accept that saucepan. It'southward usually things families have brought in that we can't give dorsum. I try to wait through there. I'm trying to effigy out how to practice lips better. Embalming can make their lips look thin or like you lost your lips altogether.

Right, you can't exactly use a lip-plumping product on them.
Right. Information technology doesn't take any issue.

Practice you accept a preference for color cosmetic brands?
I don't take a favorite in particular.  Some families are very particular about their makeup and will bring it in. For i lady, they brought in two bags of makeup and it was all Chanel. I was like, "Hot damn, lady!"  That was exciting.

What is the restoration procedure like when someone died under traumatic circumstances?
We've had a couple of those. There was a pastor that was doing a good deed and someone shot him in the chest and he died. That one was really hard. This was a man who had done so much for everyone else. I did a little restoration on his face and spent three days with him. I got attached to him.

At the showing, his married woman and kids were in that location. Finally, the wife came up to me and told me I had washed a expert chore. She was pleased with the way that he looked and I just … bankrupt downwardly. In mortuary schoolhouse, they tell y'all that you aren't supposed to cry in front end of the family. Merely I don't know where these tears came from.

She talked about how he ever nerveless people throughout life. For her, it was special that even in death, he was all the same collecting people. She was most glad I got that attached to him.

I'm sure that people take this misconception that embalmers and people who work in the death industry are creepy and cold. Only from your blog and speaking to you on the phone, I can tell you lot're a warm person. Are people surprised when you lot tell them yous're an embalmer?
A little scrap. I hateful, I have a purple Mohawk. And I love it! At the minor funeral home I piece of work for, the man I piece of work for is Mormon, and he'south so prissy and great. We've gotten to know each other. He thinks my purple hair is cute. I never would have thought. I know the pilus tin can be a little out there. Just the families, they're in proficient hands if they do stick with me.

Most people when they initially find out, just start in on the questions. Common reactions are, " Information technology'due south scary. Aren't you afraid that at that place is a expressionless body in the back?" I'yard similar, "No. It would exist scary if something sat upwards nether that sheet." I haven't run across anyone repulsed by what I exercise. I do become a lot of people that say, "I'm glad yous want to do that because I don't recollect there are many people that would want to do that."

A Mortician's Beauty Secrets